Practice Patience And Don’t Judge Yourself

Practice Patience And Don’t Judge Yourself

 “Come, come, whoever you are, wanderer, worshiper, lover of learning.It doesn’t matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vow a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.”


How many things do you set out to do and then become diverted? Have you made resolutions to get healthy and fit? Have you endeavored to learn a language or musical instrument? Have you promised yourself to ardently commit to change in some capacity, but fallen short, or worse, not even tried?  I enjoy Rumi’s poem because it gently reminds me to practice patience and refrain from self-judgment.

Thoughtful appraisals of our actions and behaviors are helpful, but berating oneself is rarely useful. I have been teaching martial arts, boxing and weight training for over twenty-five years, and not a week goes by that I don’t hear people reference themselves as stupid, or swear when they perform a movement that does not meet their expectations.

“…how we practice and train is often how we do life.”

 I hear these admonishments enough that I felt compelled to offer my thoughts on these moments; I don’t find them particularly useful. Recently, one of my student athletes at Hilbert College rebuked himself in a class setting. I asked if he did that often, and he assured me that he berated himself all the time. I asked why, and he assured me because he deserves it anytime he screws up in his sport. In the moment you do this, however, I believe there is tension. The latter can impede your movements for just one or two seconds. In that small space of time, your opponent can be twenty feet past you. Tension inhibits the ability to move fluidly, and velocity is impaired. Then, without velocity, you’ll have no power. Well, this might seem only useful for athletes, but I believe that how we practice and train is often how we do life. Upbraiding oneself while training usually follows you into your personal life. Yes, the chastisement is only for a moment, but it lingers, and I doubt the efficacy of it. Many years ago I decided that heaping huge amounts of self-criticism on oneself was a form of punishment. Once the punishment is doled out, however, it becomes ok to make the mistake again. It’s like doing time for the crime. Of course we are always ready to castigate ourselves, and continue the vicious cycle forever.

Habits are formed over time, and some serve us more than others. Practice patience, and be kind to yourself. When you fall down; get up faster than you fell. When you make a mistake; fix it. When you get lazy; change it. When your efforts weaken; simply figure out how to improve it without adding the drama of self-loathing. Analyze your mistakes so that you can learn from them, but don’t pour the “hot oil of judgment” over yourself because of them. There is nothing strong about this behavior, and the process of letting go of these self berating responses will make your more productive, less tense, and a more powerful individual.

Be Great.

KC’s Fitness brings unique cross-training to Orchard Park

KC’s Fitness brings unique cross-training to Orchard Park

KC’s Fitness brings unique cross-training to Orchard Park

The Orchard Park Sun published an article featuring the new KC’s Fitness expansion into Orchard Park. Take a look and please feel free to share it.

“Cunningham opened his Orchard Park satellite location at 273 Thorn Ave. last year both because he lives in Orchard Park with his family and because he felt Orchard Park offered nothing similar to KC’s Fitness.

“I feel that KC’s in the Southtowns will do very well, and make a difference in the lives of the good folks who come here,” said Cunningham.

Just a year after opening, the Orchard Park location has 61 members, and is still growing.

The Orchard Park location currently offers 13 weekly classes, and is focused more heavily on boxing and strength and conditioning classes than the new 100 Gelston St. Buffalo location that opened this June, which holds 29 weekly classes including private training, boxing, MMA, Aikido, Muay Thai, Systema, and Kettle-Bell and Spartan classes.”



Kevin’s Corner: Show me your company and I will tell you who you are.

Kevin’s Corner: Show me your company and I will tell you who you are.

“Show me your company, and I will tell you who you are.”
Old Irish saying

We have been in business for over twenty-three years, and at 100 Gelston for just three months. It has been a true joy to see this building transformed for us, and the classes, personal training, and environment have never been better in all my years off owning KC’s Fitness. Yes, we have had many great instructors and coaches here over the years, however, the harmony, and desire to make a difference in people’s lives is the best I have ever seen it. There are twenty seven classes offered on a weekly basis and hundreds of personal training  appointments each month. I am always impressed how hard people train in all these sessions. What makes the difference, however, is the energetic spirit and kindness that emanates from them. My friend, the late Bill Mahr who owned Allentown Athletix for many years often remarked about this. Bill had well over a thousand members at his facility, and we used to connect quite often. Sometimes, he would stop over, and simply watch classes. He shared that he loved his gym, but that the combination of excellent instruction, intensity and camaraderie between members was nothing he had ever seen before on that level. Later, he wrote to me “that the combination of excellence inside the walls of KC’s and community involvement on Buffalo’s westside made our little business nothing short of amazing.” I miss Bill and wish he could see us now.

I will be writing a small piece each month, and it will be called Kevin’s Corner. I hope that the things I write will be relevant and worthy of your time. I am excited by the enhanced programing and offerings our members will see at KC’s as the months unfold. I started this business while I was in graduate school in late 1991, and thought it would pay for books back then. I liked the changes I saw in others, and I liked the changes I saw in myself. I am glad I abandoned graduate school and started this business. It is only as good as the people who come here for training, and by this standard, I would say it is a great place. There will many wonderful things that continue to happen here, and thank you all for being a part of our continued growth and excellence. Be great.